10 Months

(posted by Bryan)

I can’t believe Carson and Harper are 10 months old. It’s gone by fast. Harper is a doll. She is easy going, giggly, and sweet. She loves Mickey Mouse, hugs, cheerios, and her paci. She has started crawling and her latest trick is pulling up on the bench and pulling off all of the folded laundry! As her dad, I'm probably a little biased, but I think she is the cutest thing I've ever seen. Between me and her three big brothers, I think she'll be well protected!  It’s even harder to believe that Carson has only been home from the NICU for 9 months, off the oxygen for 6 months, and out of a helmet for 2 months. That kid! He’s such a trooper! He’s such a mess! His unofficial nick name right now is “Mr. Crazy Pants”. He doesn’t know how to be still and he does not like naps. He loves to watch Jordan and Nathan and you can tell that he is just itching to chase them around and be right in the middle of whatever they are doing. He laughs at them when we ride in the car and if they aren’t paying attention to him, he will start squealing until they do. He loves Mickey Mouse and giggles every time he sees him on TV. When I watch that little boy army crawl around the house, hear him laugh, and hear him cry, it’s surreal to think that just 10 months ago he was fighting for his life. 10 months ago his lungs were filled with holes. We couldn’t hold him, we couldn’t feed him, and we couldn’t even touch him. 10 months ago we listened to a doctor say that she wasn’t sure Carson had enough healthy lung tissue to survive. To say we are grateful is not nearly enough. We are humbled and in awe of God’s provision and healing. The most sobering part of our story is the knowledge that God doesn’t love us anymore than those who have lost a child, or not been able to have a child at all. That he healed Carson, even though he doesn’t love him anymore than a child born with any number of physical or mental impairments, or a child born into extreme poverty or abuse. When I consider all these things, just saying I’m grateful, feels very inadequate.   And so, we will continue to share this story for many reasons. One reason I continue to reflect on this is because I don’t want to forget and I don’t want to water down or down play the miracle that God did in our family. I think about when Jesus healed the group of men with leprosy and out of the ten, only one came back to offer thanks and to give God the glory for healing him. It was God who protected and healed and we will continue to give Him all of the glory. This week we will go before our church family and dedicate Carson and Harper to the Lord. We will dedicate ourselves to being Godly parents. Ones that will teach them to love scripture, love others, and most importantly, point them towards a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. 

At this same time last year Becca was on bed rest and they were preparing us for all of the complications that the babies could have if they had been born during that time. They told us that we had a 14-19 day window of the babies being born (Becca made it 77 days). We were praying for time. We were praying for good health. We were praying for God to protect Becca and our sweet unborn twins. We were praying for God to protect the hearts of Jordan and Nathan who would have to be without their mom for an extended period of time. God provided all and so much more. What a difference a year makes.  We are blessed and we are grateful and we are thrilled to be together for Christmas this year!